Never mess with a depressed GOW who is leaving glorious sun-soaked weather for the rain-soaked UK.
The three of us were going through security at Faro Airport this morning and it was not exceptionally busy by their standards, so it was a surprise when a young jobs-worth security guy tells me that I can’t follow the rest of the family in the same poor-excuse-of-a-queue.
When the rookie deliberately fenced me off from the other two, I absent-mindedly undid his ridiculous makeshift barricade and say politely não, obrigado I want to go through with my family, to which the young rookie responded with a tirade of Portuguese expletives, whilst manhandling flummoxed GOW into a queue she didn’t want to be in and growling this is how we work!
Resisting, I try to look at his name tag as he pushes me away … take your hands off me he says aggressively in perfect English. I, politely, tell him not to be so rude, to which he barks I don’t speak English.
Realising we are providing cabaret for other equally depressed Brits returning to the appalling UK climate, we call his supervisor, who lamely backs up his rude young rookie by breathtakingly repeating the words this is how we work.
My lack of coherent Portuguese prevented me from saying that I have been traveling in and out of Faro Airport since the supervisor was in nappies and his rude rookie’s parents were barely in secondary school. Never before have I been forced to leave my traveling companions at security and made to queue elsewhere … anywhere in the world.
But … this security spat would never have erupted if basic common courtesy had been adhered to. And yes, of course, I followed the queue I had intended to be in. I did take names in the heat of the moment, but I am not a vindictive person and although it left a bitter taste, it had gone after an in-flight Latte.
Coincidentally, whilst going through security at Gatwick a few hours later, I was asked Madam, are you all traveling together? Which is how it should be.