I have never been a fan of camping. It stems from being packed off to Pony Club camp aged about 9 and finding out the ensuite was 500 meters away.
Grovelling around in a field in the dark looking for the tent covering a hole in the ground, has never been my idea of fun and my allergy to camping has never gone away.
The thought of trying to find a portaloo in the dark when crowd camping at a music festival has, for me, always been very unappealing, even when I was younger.
So watching Glastonbury from the comfort of my armchair has become a time-honored tradition over the years, thanks to the BBC.
I delivered two back-pack loaded Reading Festival Goers to the airport this week, having lectured them senseless on the importance of keeping themselves, as well as their stuff safe and imparting stark toileting tales. As it turns out … I am the one to have learned something new.
I will never know how I have got to my ripe old age without knowing about these fantastic inventions.
Keep all your valuables safe at all times
Wiz like a bloke … into the wind, into the bushes, or into a bag in the privacy of your own tent